Wizard Council
Born from frothy beginnings, The Wizard Council is a modern-day supergroup of legendary killers, thrillers, and miller beer spillers. First assembled at Chaos Wars 16 and continuing to this day, the Wiz-Hards are a swarthy gang of playboy zap-chuckers, drunk ass silver-beards, & potion peddlers with that certain spicy sway. Mostly just stoners, adventurers, and drunk people. ZERDS. Many posers and dirty casuals, after dawning a hat for an event, or playing Wizard Staff one night will claim Wizard heritage, but sorry it's not that simple, and the road to true DARPing Wizardry takes more than a cool name and a drunk night. Wizarding is a lifestyle. So listen up you skanks and peasants...
- Is a storm a brewin' set to fuck up your party-picnic? Are horny ass ogres on the loose in your backyard? Did a shithead necromancer just bring your dead dog back to life? We handle that shit. Call us. We wiz.
- Street Cred: http://www.vice.com/read/LARP-harder (in 2024, Vice Magazine shut down its website for good. This article has been transcribed here on the wiki at Vice Magazine Article)
Wizards Of Note
The Original Nine Council Wizards
- Radaghast the Brown: Kade (bird magic)
- Metatron the Blue: Troll (word magic, inventor of robot magic)
- Guildenstern the Gold: Kurgan (key magic)
- Alexander the White: Aleksii (cultural appropriation magic)
- Pontius the Purple: Itan (purple magic? duh.)
- Semen-X the Blur: Bishop (time magic, caretaker of the time matrix)
- Maldar the Magician: Bodmin (illusion magic)
- Squim Squam the Shaman: Juicer (diversity hire)
Full-Time Members
- Rosencrantz the Red: Fish (red-eye dank magic)
- Orgent the Orange: Argent (laughing magic)
- Faticus the Bland: Brute (master of cantrips)
- Man-O-Beer the Weird: Melee Moses (alcohol magic)
- Bilbongus the Percolated: Bilbo (tasty magic)
- Bartlby the Baked/AK47 the Black: Uargvak (black magic)
- Synthesus the Mellodick: Sare (shredulation magic)
- Def the Leopard: Ace (the dude Ace) (butt-rock magic)
- Complainicus the Annoying: Veithryn (master of complaintrips)
- Cackitus Pam: Krow (interdimensional travelling magic)
- Hephaestus the Hasty: Marrick (Artifact creation)
- Rodney of Blasting: Sybion (Destruction magic)
- Foot the Vagidrian: Rotten (Poison Magic)
- Skivonicus the Indigo: Sky (Blue Magic)
- Euclid the Gold: Finn (Geometric Magic)
- Baracca the yet to be determined: Dagger (Shaman magic)
- Marlamad the Lad: Voss (Madness Magic Tongue Twister Magic)
Acolytes
- Yolo the Yellow: Poo (blunt-rolling magic)
- Post-Humous the Destroyer: Postal (chaos magic)
- Dildongus the Diarrhea: Battle Christ (haggard magic)
- Mojito the Mexican: Ruben (latino magic)
- Bear (oso magic)
Affiliates
- Brodo Faggins: Ralimar (grill ass bird)
- Kidontis the Forever Young: Rope (youth magic)
- Cross the Frost Boss: Elerosse (ice magic)
- Kroncinox the Incinerator: Marduk (fire magic)
- Dillweed the Condiment: Dangus (flavor magic) (once, unheard-of since)
- Cevin the Chronicler: Cord (scribe/fanboy)
- Stichio the Corpse-Toucher: Stich (formerly a shaman-terrorist turned crack-rock golem turned time-warp Litch)
- The Sloth-Elk: Bran (slow, angry creature dude)
- Purple the Haze: Wadu (recently outed as a double agent working for The Witch Coven)
Battle Log
- The Storm of Chaos.
- The Witches Council, The Cult of Banzai, Blackwater Shaman Zombies, and Grand Iggi the Corrupted.
- The Son of the Storm of Chaos, The Plague Doctor, and the Foggy Demon.
- Ratchet the Gnoll Girl, Crybaby Pirates, & The Son of the Son of the Storm of Chaos (shittiest installment in the franchise yet).
- Brohemian Grove Blood Magick Millionaires featuring Donald Trump, Moloch, & The High Priest Beef Supreme. The Screech Witch. Aliens. And the quiet rise of the Assassins.
- No Wifi, Low Energy, Dehydration
p.s. You can be a member too! Just submit your resume' and the $20 (non-refundable) registration fee to any full-time members, to then be interviewed for a possible position amongst the council.