The First Kobold

This is the tale of the first Kobold:

Before the befores, the woes and lamentings,
indeed before the invent of inventing,
before all the gobos, the planets, the elves
Invent the kobold, invented himself...
And falling... as really, what else could he do?
He missed the darn thing when he made up the moon.
Bored of the falling, he made lending hands,
and Invent the Kobold, invented landing and land.
(But not in that order)
Proud of his crafting, a newly minted earth,
he did feel quite parched, for he invented thirst.
Nary a drop could the poor kobold see,
so Invent the Kobold invented the sea.
Upon taking a sip, he felt the first anguish,
he screamed, “that was way too salty”, thus inventing language.
In the second ever sentence, he croned “give me a break”,
and then he got busy making rivers and lakes.
Slaked from a sip, he found himself tired,
invented napping, waking, being chilly, then fire.
No longer tired or thirsty or cold,
the first ever kobold began to feel bold.
He roamed the land of the earth, shiny new,
knowing he had much more inventing to do.

-As written by Puck, transcribed by Witchdoktor Galya