Julfeism

Julfeism is the ancient religion once forgotten in the world and now restored by Necronos. In Julfeism mythology, Julf, father of all gods had created the universe and all that occupy it. He created planets and life and found that the work was too much. From his loins he sprung the other gods and goddesses to help him with all that existed. All was good, until The Great Mistake occurred. This Mistake was so Great that it drove Julf to create alcohol and to get drunk. The inebriated Julf sought to fix The Great Mistake and destroyed the universe.

The other gods and goddesses were upset with their father doing this. Gloron, the sky god came forth and refashioned a new universe from the ashes of the one previous. The others rejoiced and all was as it is.

Julf, still inebriated, also rejoiced and changed from a sad drunk to a happy drunk. He handed over his mantle of Head God to his son Gloron, much to everyone's delight.

Gods and Goddesses

Gloron - the Head of the Gods and God of Sky, and the Heavens.

Multjun - God of War, Warriors, and Killing

Klog - God of Crafts,Craftsmen, Chin Divots, and Pop-tarts

Hidiotunk - Hermaphrodite God/dess of Teabagging, Initiations, and Breakfast Cereal

Gung - God of Eating, Flatulence, and Pooping

Horgumph - God of Mischief, Passing out, and Vomiting

Foof - Goddess of Love, Sex, and Gropping

Moob - God of Men, Scratching, and Doing Stupid Things

Wooz - Goddess of Women, and Smelling Good

Kelch - Goddess of Hunting, All Animals, and Masturbation

Gookoo - God of the Sea, Water, and Pirates

Flornork - God of Earth, Fire, and Ninja

Thorm - God of Death, and Change

Punjoob - God of Agriculture, Food, and Caffeine

Hobunk - God of Falling Over, and dropping things

Julf - Father of the Gods, God of Drinking, and Alcohol

Marmik - God of Sloth's, Doing Nothing, and Un-participation

Overview

It is perhaps misleading to speak of "Julfeism" as a unified system of dogma or ritual; perhaps the most conspicuous aspect of the religions practiced in the Realms is their overall variety and their localism. Different people worship different deities, sometimes with epithets that specified their local nature; Pirates had Gookoo; Garber's, Klog; Ebonhold is a center for the worship of Julf, and so.

Worship

The most widespread public act of worship in Julfeism is dedication and sacrifice. Dedication is the simple act of dedicating acts or objects to the gods so that they might be pleased and might bestow their blessings on the people. Sacrifices were also given, such as sacrificing a drink of beer or a blood sacrifice, so that blessings maybe given.

Votive gifts are offered to the gods by their worshippers. They are often given for benefits already conferred or in anticipation of future divine favors. Or they can be offered to propitiate the gods for crimes involving blood-guilt, impiety, or the breach of religious customs. They can be given either voluntarily or in response to demands by the cult's priesthood that the donor fulfill a religious vow or honor some religious custom.

Case in point, Necronos went to the market once to purchase fresh spring water. After buying other products that he needed he left the market without the water he sought. This was due to Gookoo showing his displeasure towards Necronos for all the bad, yet truthful, things he had said about Pirates whom are sacred to Gookoo. To honor Gookoo and to avert his displeasure again, Necronos went back to the market, purchased the water and sacrificed a part of it so that the Sea God might be pleased.

Organization

Religious Authority

There is no official authority who decides whether a person is accepted into, or dismissed from, the community of believers. Julfeism is open to all, regardless of race, age, gender, or previous beliefs. It is enough to believe in the central beliefs of any or all Gods of Julfeism. This is formally done by reciting a statement of belief to the Gods, which should be made sincerely from the heart, without which a person cannot be classed a Julfeist. It is enough to believe and say that one is a Julfeist, and behave in a manner befitting to the Gods to be accepted into the community of Julfeism.

Cults of the Gods

Cults have arisen for the specific worship of specific gods. The cult of the War God, Multjun, paints the symbols of their god on their body before going to war. They practice fighting and are always prepared to do battle on any who see worthwhile. Meanwhile, the cult of Gung delight in eating. They see being a fatty as a life spent serving their god. The sacrifice a small portion of their food so that they might not suffer from heartburn and that they might be able to later serve their god by burping and pooping.

Most cults are lead by a High Priest or Priestess who receives the guidance from their God and speaks it to the people so that they might be able to serve that god better. They lead the followers of their God, with help from their priests, by teaching their Gods commandments, leading the people in worship on their Gods holy days and by being their Gods voice on earth. Cedric, the famed High Priest of Julf is a prime example of High Priest-iness. His love and devotion to his God is so apparent in the way he leads his Gods followers by example.

The cults and their High Priest/Priestesses are extremely possessive of their God/Goddess and try to politically annex to out right destroy other cults claiming worship of their specific God. At the Crossroads of Jaarloph, before the restoration, the cult of Hobunk the Slanted marched on the camp of Hobunk the Leaning Over to discuss the possibility of an annex. While each cult demonstrated why it was more superior by feats of falling over and dropping things, the cult of Hobunk the Clumsy with the aid of the cult of Multjun the Meanie put the High Priest and High Priestess of the other cults to the sword and made their followers swear loyalty on the name of their God to the High Priest of Hobunk the Clumsy.

The Restoration

In the time of antiquity, the Gods of Julfeism in their infinite wisdom found their followers unfit to worship them. They were upon the path leading to The Great Mistake. Gloron, Head of the Gods erased from the minds of all men all knowledge of the Gods and from the earth, all signs that they ever existed. By the council of his father Julf, Gloron lead his fellow Gods into exile from the world of men, so that The Great Mistake could be avoided. They knew that the time would come where one man would come that would be able to restore Julfeism to the lands and that they will again be worshipped by man.

Upon the birth of Necronos, the Gods rejoiced. They saw in him the perfect factors to restore Julfeism to the world. When the time came in his life, the Gods appeared to him and told Necronos of the great wonders and the whole truth about the universe. How they were the true rulers of man and beast, and how great the world will once again be when he preaches to the people about the Gods.

Gloron declared Necronos to be his High Priest and Ad interim High Priest to all other Gods until a suitable High Priest or Priestess could be declared. Gloron gave Necronos the divine mandate to deliver the word of the Gods to all people so that they maybe enlightened to the true path.