Ugagagaba
A most enlightening tale of Ugagagaba, the all seeing maw, the light in the darkness, that one true God (gosh), and how he came to enlighten the ignorant masses to his awesomeness:
A long, old story is this one... passed down through generations past, and for the years to come. This is a tale of one little Kobold and his fabulous journey into the heavens to meet the One True God. His origin? Not important. No, he was but a method of bringing the word to the masses. The match that lit the candle, if you will.
His name was Splat, and this tale starts with his very fortunate encounter with a Troll. It ended when he was skipped, much like a stone, across the very ground you stand on. nay, across the very earth. It ended when it lifted off because of the shear strength behind that Troll's throw, and came to an abrupt stop on the moon. Coincidentally, that is also how the biggest crater up there was formed, but again, that is another story.
Now, when Splat had come to his senses he pulled himself from the crater and dusted himself off. There was darkness above; unfamiliar soil sifted between his clawed feet. The blinding white terrain bit at his eyes and in a panic he shielded them and spun away. But, in doing so, suddenly a new sight caught his eye...
Before him, hanging in the sky like a gigantic pearl was... Earth. He had never seen it from this position before. Blue, green, and white... all swirled together with the sun masking it in a glorious glow. Enraptured, Splat marveled at the beauty of it. Eyes open wide, mouth hanging ajar. Truly he had never seen anything quite so beautiful in all of his life. No glittering trinket or shiny bauble could compare...
But, the more he gaped, the more his eyes adjusted to the new environment. Slowly, ever so gradually, the darkness of space receded and he became aware that there was... more. The planet was not alone. It did not decorate the endless darkness by itself, no... twinkling stars blinked in the distance. Swirls of light color stretched as far as he could see. But by far the most startling, and frightening, thing of all was the massive, gigantic jaws that surrounded the earth like a morbid picture frame.
So big were they that the planet hung in the center like a marble. Small and plain in comparison. Teeth, long sharp and pointed angled down as if stretching for it, reaching for the planet like deadly spears. The massive maw was white, bleached bone. Not a speck of flesh to be seen. And from every angle behind it, rays of light stretched out; every color imaginable...a rainbow that set the maw aglow.
Splat, overwhelmed, fell to his knees in wonder. Somewhere deep inside he knew, he just knew: This was Ugagagaba. The one true god. Unfathomable for most, but not for a kobold, the splendor that was Ugagagaba was not lost on splat. Big fat tears rolled from his eyes; a howl of pure joy ripped from his mouth, and he wept before the god.... no, HIS god. The God of all.
He only stirred when he felt a tug, like a string wrapped around his rib cage was pulling him to his feet. He could suddenly HEAR words within him, like a thrum of pure power... whispered in a language he didn't know, yet could understand. He knew then, what he must do. What he had been brought there to do. perhaps even what he had been destined to do. He would return to earth and spread the word of Ugagagaba to the ignorant, suffering masses. He would make sure that the One True God was known, and that any who opposed him were brought to a swift, violent end.
But, how was he supposed to get back? The god whispered through him again, and soon he had his answer. He'd jump, of course! The moon was above earth!
And so, gathering his courage Splat prepared himself. He wasn't alone, however. To help his messenger along Ugagagaba reached forth with a glowing beam of light. It would guide him, Splat was assured. It would ensure his safe return. And thus with one great running leap, Splat bounced off of the moon, guided by the light and returned to the Earth's surface, where he spread the word of the Great Ugagagaba. And there ends our tale. The store of the all seeing Maw... The light in the Darkness...