Pirates

A pirate showing he has what a ninja never will.

Pirate Info:

• Hated by Metallica
• Awesome
• Smelly - It's called good personal filth management.
• Way cooler than Ninjas
• Make everybody die except for the hot chicks
• Physics Geniuses, how else could they shoot those cannons with such accuracy?
• The best drinkers and makers of Rum!
• Total Chick Magnets!
• We also have flying ships!
• Pirates loot and pillage all the time.
• The only thing that can kill a pirate is another pirate.
• Pirates drink rum almost exclusively. The only exception is for an occasional iced mocha or chai tea with 2% milk.
• Pirates Prefer BBQ- or Cajun-flavored potato chips.
• A pirate's sweat tastes like whiskey.
• Pirates possess parrots with eye patches and pirated prosthetic peg legs.
• Sometimes pirates kick cats just because.
• A pirate's semen is indestructable.
• Pirates hate all forms of dancing, except for break dancing, which lumberjacks would agree is awesome.
• All pirates have hair on their backs and knuckles.
  • Women find this intriguing.
• A pirate ejaculates fully-grown leprechauns.

A time-traveling pirate ship flies undetected over trees full of fragile, delicate, angst-ridden ninjas in the future.